Looking at the the bigger picture
I made a determination to change my environment and by that I meant my work, home, relationships, everything really. I didn’t know how I wanted them to change but I knew I wanted a dramatic shift from how things currently were. So for this reason I decided to support a climate change activity, thinking that I was making a positive cause towards my own personal climate change. However, I had the worst time.
It turned out that on top of the climate change activity I would also be supporting another activity and I was unprepared for this. I knew I was doing good but internally I was uneasy because I was running around like a headless chicken and felt that I didn’t give my all to either event.
Every thing about the events was different from what I was used to. From the way I needed to be dressed, to the clientele I was supporting, to the venue and content of the day. I was also in a supervisory role. I was physically challenged and knackered by the end of the day.
I knew I had done my best given the circumstances and that the way I worked with my fellow volunteers was the best behaviour to adopt in order to serve both clients, but I did not enjoy any part of the day. My colleagues on the other hand loved it and the clients were happy.
Fast forward to six months later and I told a friend how I felt doing that activity. He gave me the insight into my situation that I had been overlooking. I had made a determination to change my environment and that two in one activity was just that. It was different in every level to anything else I’d volunteered for and really shook my internal foundations. It was a challenging environment for me but I was able to adapt which is a skill that will no doubt come in handy in the future.
Since that chat I’ve realised other things. Soon after that activity I decided to shift the way I spent my free time, looked at who I spent my time with and what makes me happy and assessed what things were worth worrying about and best left. I have a deeper understanding about how I like to work and looking back can appreciate that human revolution.